while I was pretty thoroughly corrupted to begin with in the ways people usually think of, Ozy was a significant influence in turning me American and that is strange and worrying and entirely correct and perfectly fitting and I don’t know how the fuck it managed to happen and I don’t mind it although I have no idea how I managed to turn into one who would not mind such a thing because thinking back I totally expect that I would’ve minded and tl;dr: ozy is corruptive in even strange novel unexpected ways
Proposal: require Everest climbers to have already made the summit of at least three mountains over 4000m in height, so they have some idea of what they are getting themselves into.
Alternate Proposal: rename Everest to Death Mountain to get the point across.
You think giving it a badass name like \m/ DEATH MOUNTAIN \m/ will keep people away?
Don'tgonearthe Castle, we call it. I don’t know whether you’ve heard of it?’ ‘It’s a strange name.’ ‘Oh, he used to laugh about it. The local coachmen used to warn visitors, you see. “Don’t go near the castle,” they’d say. “Even if it means spending a night up a tree, never go up there to the castle,” they’d tell people. “Whatever you do, don’t set foot in that castle.” He said it was marvellous publicity. Sometimes he had every bedroom full by 9 p.m. and people would be hammering on the door to get in. Travellers would go miles out of their way to see what all the fuss was about.
fine, call it Tax Mountain
i feel like that might still be too interesting
@sinesalvatorem, for one, seems likely to be interested in Tax Mountain
ALISON IS AN OUTLIDER ADN SHOULD ONLY BE COUNTED AFTER YOU HAVE TAKEN THE PROPER RITUAL PRECAUTIONS
Hello I heard there was an Economics Geographical Location…
does combination “minarchist mountain dew euphoria - pc sjw radicals - liberal - decentralized chomskian anarcho-molotov-cocktailism” mean I’m on the boundary of green and purple?
(also, this makes me feel like replacing the texts with “I - li - ll - L” and I’m a terrible person)
i have had some extraordinarily interesting thoughts about chickens, including, but not limited to:
the trolley problem but with chickens
chickens in gimp suits
masses of chickens being spontaneously created and destroyed
every chicken on earth being replaced with something that is almost but not quite like a chicken
a chicken spa with rows of chickens being massaged
an infinite amount of chickens
chicken upload
cyborg chickens
becoming a chicken
and a poor family watching in horror as their chickens disappear one by one.
Oh no, chicken politics:
Capitalism: You have two chickens. The chickens have planned obsolescence built in so you have to repurchase them every few years. The chickens are classified as software and you don’t really own them but simply license a right to use them, and thus PoliceMob will hunt you down if you try to breed more chickens or CRISPR away the self-destruct genes.
Social democracy: You have two chickens. The state takes one of your chickens. You spend several weeks filling forms to qualify for the Chicken Investment Subsidy Program, after which you can get your chicken back. If you didn’t do this, your neighbor would be the one to get your chicken instead. The website www.governmentisgood.com explains how great it is that the state gives free chickens to people.
Statist socialism: You have two chickens. The state takes both; slaughters one and gives the meat to its voters; sends the other to the president’s offshore bank account in Panama; sets a price ceiling on eggs; and declares you a class enemy for not being able to produce eggs under that price. You buy eggs from the black market for twenty times the official price.
Anarcho-capitalism: You have two chickens. After your regular payments to Dawn Defense to make sure that your chickens aren’t stolen and that any rooster you would hypothetically buy in the future would actually be a rooster and that you are protected against all the things you couldn’t possibly anticipate, you can save a few satoshis each day. But one day you will surely have saved enough to purchase a rooster and hire your own servants.
Anarcho-communism: You have two chickens. PoliceMob shows up and shoots them because fuck you that’s why. The mainstream media says the chickens must have deserved it because surely PoliceMob wouldn’t do such a thing without a very good reason.
Mutualism: You have two chickens. You keep your chickens in your living room so that they remain unambiguously in your possession. You spend every waking hour doing something vaguely chicken-related so you can claim your daily production of eggs are worth 16 work-hour-units.
Utilitarianism: You have two chickens. You slightly inconvenience yourself to increase their welfare substantially.
Postmodernism: You have two chickens and absolutely no clue how to produce eggs. You invent ever more complicated constructs to try to stop anyone from noticing that material chickens in the material world actually do produce material eggs, no matter how clever your arguments are.
Steel postmodernism: Chickens are a social construct. You can’t eat social constructs, but the social construct “egg” usually refers to something that can be eaten so you use it as a convenient shorthand to conceptualize reality. You laugh at people who seriously ask questions like “what came first, the chicken or the egg?”
The memory grew brighter. “Professor Slughorn,” Hermione asked brightly, “What if someone wanted to split his wealth into multiple offshore accounts? Say…seven?
“Good heavens, seven?”
“Well, isn’t seven considered a magically significant number?”
“Merline’s beard, girl! Isn’t it bad enough to consider doing it once? To dodge their tax bill seven times…This is all hypothetical, isn’t it, Hermione? All academic?”
“Of course, sir,” Hermione said, smiling. “It’ll be our little secret.”
latin:
words like 'yes' and 'no' aren't important. memorize these 3000 different ways to talk about killing people though because you will use them
greek:
hello naughty students it's participle time
egyptian:
ancient pictionary
french:
pronouncing every letter is for chumps
german:
let's combine every other word together to create the U L T I M A T E F R A N K E N W O R D
mandarin:
lol whats a verb tense
spanish:
LOL WHAT ISN'T A VERB TENSE
japanese:
I heard you like learning new writing systems so here, have three of them (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧
russian:
can verbs of motion "go" kiss my ass or can they "be carried by vehicle towards, and eventually reach, on one singular incident, that has not yet happened, but is certain to happen" my ass
finnish:
take a few root words, worderize rootsfromforth quiteunfew deroottakenworderizations for everything else you needeth towordalize
