There’s lots of stories about women succeeding at traditionally male things (e.g. Mulan, Legally Blonde) but almost none about men succeeding at traditionally female things. When a woman does male things, it’s “she’s a woman but she’s awesome enough to live up to male standards”, but when a man does female things, it’s treated as a joke at his expense.
We need more stories about “he’s a man but he’s awesome enough to live up to female standards”.I imagine you don’t count, like, Mrs. Doubtfire?
While I can see how Mrs. Doubtfire is sort of about a man learning to succeed at femininity, I find it deeply unsatisfying for two reasons. First, Daniel Hillard (Robin Williams’s character) only attempts to learn feminine skills in order to pass as a woman. This reinforces the idea that femininity is a female thing. Second, at the end of the movie, I feel that he’s presenting as a more-well-rounded masculine, rather than simply feminine. The message seems to be “it’s okay to cook and clean and spend time with your kids, because it doesn’t compromise your masculinity”. I want a message of “it’s okay to not be masculine”. I’m vaguely reminded of countersignaling; I get the feeling that Daniel Hillard is allowed to have feminine traits because he manages to not let them overshadow his masculinity.
By contrast, consider Kanahe Tomohisa, from Puella Magi Madoka Magica. He’s a stay-at-home husband who wears an apron and takes care of the housework, his build is slim and his demeanor submissive, and this is (at least in the episodes I’ve seen so far) not remarked upon at all or treated as a source of either drama or humor. It’s treated as perfectly normal, natural, ordinary, healthy, unremarkable that he should tend the home and the children while his wife earns the family income as a career businesswoman. The show isn’t really about him, he’s only a supporting character; but he’s the sort of character that would be a natural consequence of the shows I want to see.I feel like the fact that Elle didn’t compromise her femininity was a big part of Legally Blonde, though. Do the two movies do this differently or am I just completely misunderstanding what you’re saying? (I haven’t actually seen Mrs. Doubtfire. I’m just going off what you say)
I’ve actually only seen a couple of scenes from Legally Blonde, but I got the impression that, while she’s femme in a shoes-and-lipstick kind of way, she’s also characterized as having qualities that are necessary to success specifically in classically male endeavors: proactive, academically gifted, a take-no-shit attitude, etc. She’s undeniably girly, but I don’t think she could be characterized as soft and vulnerable. What I know of Legally Blonde gives me a “women can be strong too” vibe, as opposed to the “it’s okay not to be strong” that I’m looking for.
popular culture cannot bear the sight of a weak man.
I’ve been thinking about this post for a while.
And it occurs to me that, just as stories about a woman breaking into the male role center partially around the secondary characters being forced to confront their own sexism and disrespect for her abilities, reversing this trope would require the story to center partially around the secondary characters around the male protagonist being forced to confront their contempt for weakness.
At least one example of this exists. There is a famous movie about an emotionally broken man who acts out in pain, until the the people around him are forced to confront and repent for the contempt and disgust they displayed towards his brokenness.
Rambo: First Blood.
Sure, in the sequels, Rambo was a straightforward action hero. But not in the first movie.
In the first movie, Rambo was the male Carrie.
goodness me, that is a good point
although it sort of reinforces the idea that men can only admit weakness once they have managed to singlehandedly fight off the entire national guard?
Men’s weakness only gets recognized and acknowledged once they have managed to singlehandedly fight off the entire national guard, and that’s very very bad and we as a civilization need to do way better so men don’t feel like they need to be able to singlehandedly fight off the entire national guard to be allowed to display a bit of weakness without having instant crosshairs of thermonuclear contempt painted on their backs.
3 months ago · tagged #steel feminism · 238 notes · source: sonatagreen · .permalink
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adramofpoison reblogged this from aenramsden and added:so much is asked out of females that is coded as weaknessand instinctual for womenthis has the potential for an awesome...
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ergoemos said: I understand and tend to agree with others that it does get better, though there are one or two episodes that hit that same cringe factor for me that you seemed to feel in the first episode.- ergoemos liked this
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loki-zen reblogged this from dagny-hashtaggart and added:Steven’s fighting is archetypically female-coded, hitting nearly everything traditionally done by the ‘Team Heart’ or...
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2fast2heck reblogged this from michaelblume and added:It ABSOLUTELY gets better. Steven getting fed up with always being pushed aside and condescended to because he’s a kid...
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michaelblume reblogged this from sonatagreen and added:a) IT GETS BETTERb) Billie Elliot?
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unknought reblogged this from sonatagreen and added:Steven Universe is, among other things, a coming-of-age story. His progression from comic-relief sidekick to a valuable...
dagny-hashtaggart reblogged this from waystatus and added:One additional cautionary note: SU occasionally dips into body horror, particularly body horror relating to growing up,...
waystatus reblogged this from sonatagreen and added:Good news: it absolutely gets better. The first 12ish episodes of Steven Universe are universally agreed to be pretty...
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nighzmarquls reblogged this from sonatagreen and added:It gets better, he grows, he starts as a child, and the cast treat him like such. And he is a child. But that does not...
fermatas-theorem said: Steven is the youngest member of the group, but the show is roughly about his coming-of-age and he definitely becomes a valuable and unique member of the team.
hybridzizi reblogged this from sonatagreen and added:I think that sense is a lot more present in the early episodes. It’s going away as he learns more and more about things....
sonatagreen reblogged this from loki-zen and added:I have now watched the first episode of Steven Universe. [screaming internally] I am a trans woman. Based on the first...
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keeperofstarrywisdom reblogged this from sonatagreen and added:A thing I saw a lot in the 80s and 90s was women being presented as succeeding in traditionally male dominated endeavors...
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